The Attack of the Killer Confidentiality Codes - Ahhhhh!!

In honour of Halloween I'd like to point out how the innocent privacy or confidentiality disclaimer, once a nice gesture at the bottom of a web site or an email footer, has grown into a monster. No doubt a combination of global warming, moulds in school portables, SUVs and gay marriage, the confidentiality disclaimer has completely morphed into a huge, abrasive, demanding manifesto threatening to fill up our email quotas everywhere.

Here are just a few that I've come across lately:

Information contained in this electronic message (email) is confidential and intended only for the use of the addressee. If the reader is not the intended recipient, you are notified that any dissemination, distribution, or copy of this communication is strictly prohibited. XYZ Incorporated accepts no responsibility or liability in respect to this email other than to the addressee. If you have received this communication in error, please notify us immediately by telephone at the number above or by email. Thank you.

The information contained in this message and any attached files are legally privileged and confidential information intended only for the use of the individual or entity to which it is addressed. If the reader of this message is not the intended recipient, you are hereby notified that any use, dissemination, distribution or copy of this message and attachments is strictly prohibited. If you have received this message in error, please immediately notify us by telephone or electronic mail and destroy the original message without making any copies. Thank you.

This email communication is intended as a private communication for the sole use of the primary addressee and those individuals listed for copies in the original message. The information contained in this email is private and confidential and If you are not an intended recipient you are hereby notified that copying, forwarding or other dissemination or distribution of this communication by any means is prohibited. If you are not specifically authorized to receive this email and if you believe that you received it in error please notify the original sender immediately. We honour similar requests relating to the privacy of email communications.

The information herein contained is legally privileged or confidential and intended only for use by the recipient individual ('s) or entity named above. If you are not the intended recipient, any disclosure, copying, redistribution or taking of any action in reliance on the communicated information is strictly prohibited. If you are in receipt of this communication in error, please delete and notify sender by reply email. Thank you.

The information contained in this e-mail, including any attachments, may contain proprietary, privileged and confidential information. If you are not the intended recipient, you are hereby notified that any reading, use or dissemination of this message is strictly prohibited. If you have received this message in error, please immediately notify us by telephone (212-555-1234) and delete this message from your system. Even though this e-mail and any attachments are believed to be free of any virus or other defect that might affect any computer system into which it is received and opened, it is the responsibility of the recipient to ensure that it is virus free, and no responsibility is accepted by (XYZ Company) for any loss or damage arising in any way from its use.

And I didn't even include the French translations, which appear with about 10-20% of the ones I see.

Having done a fair bit of work and research into privacy as part of some work I did prior to the launch of PIPEDA, I know full well why such steps are necessary; necessary to communicate in common sense terms the basics of privacy and confidentiality practice. But when the disclaimer itself is longer than the message is intended to cover, I can't help but feel the lawyers are having a bit of a laugh at the monster they've created.